Darren LeBlanc

I made a dinner tonight that is potentially going to overthrow chicken marsala as my favorite meal to cook: Bruschetta Tilapia I got the idea from a similar dish I had at Bonefish Willies in Melbourne FL.

Here’s the plan.

• - 2 tilapia filets
• - a handful of fresh basil leaves (more wont hurt)
• - extra virgin olive oil
• - 2-3 fresh firm plum tomatoes (or any…plum just has less juice and seeds)
• - 3-4 cloves garlic pressed
• - 1 cup Parmesan cheese
• - 1/2 cup mozzarella (completely optional)

1. Set the oven to 350…you are gonna be ready to go by the time it preheats!
2. Chop the basil finely (or use a food processor) and add a little oil (think Pesto!)
3. Chop your tomatoes in a bowl and add the pressed garlic with a teaspon or so of oil
4. Place your fish in an oven safe dish and completely cover each filet with the chopped basil, then top with tomato mixture
5. Bake on 350 for 20 minutes
6. Remove form oven and sprinkle on the Parmesan cheese generously to cover the whole fish. Top with mozzarella (if you have the urge – but the parmesan is just fine on its own).
7. Continue to bake about 5 minutes till the cheese is melted.

Thats it. If you really want to tickle your taste buds, use Parmigiano-Reggiano and fresh Mozzarella.

So for those of you who are waiting for updates on Misty….
Today was a better day! The decadron has helped misty’s speech to come back to a level where we can communicate again. In fact, she is getting out about 60% of her sentences without problems. Her hand also has some feeling back and she has a bit of strength in it. Today has taken a big step up emotionally for her. Really, its significantly better than this weekend. The decadron has some side effects that she doesn’t like, but overall I’d have to say we are doing better.

Tomorrow we meet with our neuro-oncologist to discuss recent changes. Also tomorrow her scans are being reviewed by our neuro-surgeon and the brain tumor board at Columbia in NYC. We have about 3 weeks till the next MRI to see if the new chemo is working.

Also, I really need to say thanks for all the prayers and words of encouragement. Misty is trying really hard to keep her faith alive…and the cards and emails (i read them to her) from all of you are a great support. So thanks…

So today is the start of misty’s new chemo.  The bright side is that the pharmacy gave it to me for free. It’s $4500 for a month and somehow when I went to pay, I had $0 due. Can’t complain about that!! And there was no preauthorization required. Thats pretty nice. I love this new insurance (Blue Bross Blue Shield).

Ok, so we are done with the good news. Misty is doing kinda rough. The last 5 days have been pretty bad. She took a distinct turn for the worse. She pretty much struggles with every sentence she tries to say.  Also, she has very limited control of her right hand. She had a tough time washing her hair tonight…and writing is completely impossible. This of course is extraordinarily frustrating, so depression is an obvious side effect. I stayed home from work most of today…but I can’t say that i did all that great a job of cheering her up. 

Not sure what else to say…wish I had better news. Today we started a new chemo as well as a drug that will reduce swelling in the brain (this could salvage some of her speech and/or motor skills). We will see how this goes…

we are home from the hospital. Misty is having a rough time with speech…just about every sentence is a struggle. Starting a new chemo tomorrow….hopefully, that will help. I’m exhausted (not much sleep last night) – I’ll update this post with more details tomorrow.

darren

I leaned over the edge of the familiar hard plastic railing of the hospital bed and moved closer to kiss Misty’s cheek. She hadn’t said much at all since the doctor gave her 2mg of intravenous Ativan, but this time she did. She whispered to me – ” I love you.” That somehow really did make it all a little bit better.

So, for the sake of good journalism, I’ll back up a bit and tell the whole story. Earlier tonight, Misty had a seizure. It lasted a little while until we gave her a nasal spray that aborted the seizure. Ok, so no biggie. She hasn’t had a seizure for a while, but a few months back, they were pretty commonplace. But then after dinner we had a little ad hoc prayer session….and in the midst of that, she had a another seizure which turned out to be bigger than the first.

We called her doctor and sure enough, once again, we end up in the Monmouth Medical ER. And tonight, we have the privilege of adding to our list of overnight hospital stays. We got here and did the routine CT scan(looked good) and blood work(results tomorrow) to check for internal bleeding and infection, etc. Then she got a shot of Ativan, which makes her completely delirious and sleepy…but its just about as effective as possible for seizure prevention. And with that, my dear misty was off to bed for the night. I am here with her in the hospital room at Monmouth. The staff is very nice tonight. They just went and dug me up this really nice recliner..

So without further adieu, I’m going to say goodnight and see just how comfortable this chair is :)

Misty got a gift in the mail today….an angel figure called “courage”. I thought it was cute so I took a few pictures.  Oh, and she had chemo today. She is starting a new drug and will get another MRI in a month…

To be completely honest…life is beginning to be a little surreal. Not in a good way like if you won the ridiculous lottery that NY is always advertising….but in that life almost seems fake. Tonight puts one more mark on the list of times I have had to tell my wife that her chemotherapy has become ineffective. One more time that we have to consider that there is no doctor in the world that would sign up to a very optimistic prognosis.

I guess its just that life looks a lot different lately. In the past I remember having feelings about wanting to be comfortable. Its like, you know…”if i just had $10,000 – I could pay off my credit cards, and put a down payment on the car I really need”. Or “If I just get this new job….life will be so much easier for us”. I remember also dreams of being influential. At the core of my heart, there is a desire to do great things…to bring positive influence to this earth. I’ve had dreams of being a government leader, or an influential community pastor…or even just a mentor to a couple great kids. All my dreams however, have been put on the proverbial “back burner”. They have been pulled from the realm of something I am reaching for and have been relinquished to a tattered folder of “things to do before I die” – and I don’t visit that folder much anymore. I guess the story is that life changes. Just about everything I cared about 3 years ago…has become vanity. (except for people…i still love people) So, I guess that’s why it’s a bit surreal. Or maybe its just that I finally have a problem that I cannot fix. Everything in life has always come so easy to me…and now, life itself is a struggle. And really…thats all I want anymore.

As you can guess, I would have hoped for a bit of better news today. In reality though, Misty took the news pretty well. We really are still holding on to hope in God. Its just a long road…and I wish she would get a break.

We had an MRI this morning.  I guess that went ok…nothing to report yet.  It takes a few days to get the results.

Lately, life has been a bit challenging. Misty has been struggling with her speech quite a bit. It took her about 8 minutes last night to say “sugar free gummy bears”. Its not always that bad…but sometimes it is. Each day is almost sure to bring an array of emotions…both highs and lows. We are holding tight to the threads of hope that we have….the hope that this wont last much longer…the hope that God will heal her…

Here is a picture of a high moment…

Its very interesting to see both the democratic candidates  at Messiah College tonight discussing faith.  Its pretty interesting that these two are discussing their personal faith in Jesus Christ…and pretty funny that its happening at Messiah (my alma mater). If you missed it on CNN, get the news here:

http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/04/13/forum/index.html

Also, here are some pictures from friday:

Well, today was probably the best day of the month. It’s the day before chemo which means, this is our best chance for Misty to be feeling well (she has the most time since the last round). So I took the gamble and took the day off of work. It turned out to be a great call. We went out to Homdel Park, just after lunch, and walked around for a while taking pictures and watching Olivia do ridiculously funny things. Like walk up to a 14 month old boy and start petting his face. She is so friendly with kids…its like there are no boundaries – quite amusing. And we were walking down a paved walkway and she turns to Misty and says “tired” – then she lays down right there on the pavement and puts her head down. It was so funny.

We hit up the Long Street Farm as well, where Olivia got to practice her animal sounds on the cows and sheep (she has them down pat). The trees were starting to bloom as well – it was beautiful. There were quite a few people out by the pond there painting. I thought that was interesting. Then from there we headed to my parents house and stayed for dinner.

Ah, a fabulous day. Now its time for bed. Misty’s appt for chemo comes early in the morning…

PS…I need to give a shout to my friend Julieann Connors, who is participating in the American Cancer Society’s Relay for Life on May 9th and 10th. If you’d like to support her, please contact me and I can put you in touch with this young hero!

 Really, it’s so humbling to have the outpouring of love that we have gotten over the last few months. I can’t believe how many of you have checked back here for updates on Misty (or any of my usual ramblings). Since January 1st of this year,  leblanclife.com has been loaded 22,645 times. That means that over 200 people sign on to this site everyday!

Also, there are many of you that have reached out to us in different ways. The cards, gifts, food, etc, have all been so helpful and encouraging. Really, you all are such an amazing support to my family. We are more appreciative than you can know.

Lastly, those of you in cyberspace who send us notes reminding us that you are praying for us. This is paramount. Thank you…

Here’s a note that I got from a good friend. Hope you enjoy it:

God hath not promised
Skies always blue
Flower-strewn pathways
All our lives through.

God hath not promised
Sun without rain
Joy without sorrow
Peace without pain.

But God hath promise
Strength for the day
Rest for the labor
Light for the way;

Grace for the trials
Help from above
Unfailing sympathy
Undying love.

Annie Johnson Flint