Darren LeBlanc

I feel weird telling people about this website. I have this internal struggle because I recognize that asking someone for prayer is a favor (you have to take time out of your day to read the update and more time to pray…and I hate asking for favors) and further, who are we that someone should spend time praying for us? I’m not so self-absorbed as to expect that attention and concern from people. But at the same time, I know we still need prayer. Misty still can’t walk or talk and the upward progress is going fairly slowly. But, there is another factor as well. I’m catching a glimpse of something that people may want to be a part of. I’m observing something everyday that could potentially greatly impact people’s lives. I feel like I have a mantle on my shoulders to spread the news of what is going on in Misty. The news that God still heals people. I fully believe that God is doing a miracle in Misty I want to tell that story to as many people as I can. Sure, I can write a book when this is over, but if people can join us in prayer now, then how much more will those people be impacted by seeing their prayers answered. Reading a story is great, but being part of the story is infinitely better.

So I’m reminding everyone to spread the word. There are many of you that have already done this. Thanks so much to you all. This post is NOT FOR YOU! You all have been really so amazing already (for instance, Courtney Girdwood and her blog sent us over 4300 visits this month! Thank you Courtney!).  But if you are new here, please consider spreading the word about Misty’s story. Here are some ideas:

1. Email friends with a link to the site or just tell them :)
2. Add a banner to your website or myspace (info here from a previous post)
3. Add a banner to your facebook. If you aren’t my friend already on facebook but you have an account, just search for my name (darren leblanc) and add me as a friend. I have 4 banners on my page. Click on the banner you like and you will be able to add it to you page. (thanks Corinne Woodward for making those!)

And for the record, this has nothing to do with my ego…I have had no part in Misty’s healing. All my gained knowledge, research, money and hard work and love all proved futile. My human efforts came to an end a few weeks ago…this is about God now. When he heals Misty, no one else can take any credit.

Lastly, and the original reason I started this post, I’ve created a mailing list for updates on Misty. Please, everyone take 10 seconds to add your email address in the form below. Your email will never be sold, and will only be used for major updates on Misty. You will still need to check the website if you want weekly status; this will only be for major news. I’d like to have an email distribution list of everyone that visits the site here. Please enter your info below. Make sure to spell your email address correctly ( I removed the “confirm your email” to make it quicker for you, so now you have to type it correctly the first time!). Then go right into your email and click on the link to confirm (if you don’t get the email, check your junk mail folder).

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Misty Update:
Today was very good. Misty felt better than she did yesterday and Olivia is getting better as well. Misty is up to 101 lbs as well…this is from a low of 93lbs a few weeks back (pretty happy she is eating well and gaining weight…this is great progress). We took a drive and ran some errands with Misty’s mom in the afternoon. Tonight, Liv went over my mom’s for a couple hours and Misty and I sat outside on the swing in front of the fire for dinner. We had minestrone soup and spinach salad and finished the evening with toasted marshmallows. I had to help Misty hold the spoon right for the soup, but once I showed her, she had it down. (As Misty gets better and continues to do new things, we have had to relearn a few things along the way) We also had an extended time of prayer and spent some alone time just swinging, holding hands and looking at the pink sky backdrop to my Boy Scout fire (Royal Rangers, really…if you know what that is). You know, sometimes it is tough that Misty and I can’t really talk to each other very well. But that’s ok…the best times are still when no words are needed at all.

Misty has nearly become nomadic. It’s like she wants to sleep anywhere put her own bed. So we spent the last two nights at her parents house. Today we are home and she has us sleeping in the living room…haha. It’s funny…I don’t fully understand it, but I think it’s funny. However, leaving the house here always gives us a small problem in the summer; ants in the kitchen. Without my active combat, they tend to run wild. Anyway, I wanted to make you all aware of something that has recently once again changed my life…it’s duct tape. Ants are no match for the MacGyver cleaning solution. Here is how it works. 

Duct Tape Cleaner Directions:
Cut a piece of tape about 12 inches long. Now hold the tape with 2 hands pulling it fairly tight. Slide the tape along the infected area at a 45 degree angle, careful to touch the ground but not stick to it. The tape will pick up all the ants you slide it over. When full, fold over and discard. May be repeated if necessary. NOTE: for extra dificult ants you made find that repeated sticking and unsticking on the infected surface may work better than the sweeping method. This method of duct tape use can be used for picking up many other things as well (I have used it to pickup about 1000 little silica gels – you know…the package that says “Do Not Eat” that comes  in the wrapping of many new products – yes, Olivia tore a couple little bags open.)

 Anyway, today wasn’t a great as yesterday. It seems that both Misty and Olivia (as well as Misty’s parents and sister) have sore throats and the associated sicknesses. I’m really hoping this bug passes quickly. Misty is ok, just a little sick feeling…and believe it or not, most days lately she has been feeling very welll. So I’m hoping to get back to that quickly. And yes, I am actually kinda excited that I feel like I have to worry about her getting a cold…it beats cancer sickness anyday. Nevertheless, I’m praying my girls (and family) get well quickly.

Today was a fabulous day; a day I won’t likely forget too soon. (especially since I’m writing about it here…haha)

This evening we hopped in the mini-van with Misty’s parents and set sail for a well established church about 45 minutes south of our house: The Church of Grace and Peace. There was a service focused on healing, so we were inclined to attend (note: Misty is feeling much better about being out in public lately – not perfect, but better…another improvement).

An extended time in song was followed by a short message and a time of corporate prayer. The church seems to have a large prayer team (there must have been 30 people or more) so everyone that came up for prayer was prayed for by one of the team members for a significant amount of time. It wasn’t a fly by night, whack you on the head and move on deal (which I often hate, do to the lack of love or compassion demonstrated for the person who is likely hurting). So I rolled Misty up to the front for prayer. A very polite and pleasantly soft spoken woman named Sheryl (who I later found out was the head of their prayer team) leaned over to hear my account of Misty’s story before beginning to pray. She expressed such kindness and prayed specifically and lovingly. We wanted to pray because Misty still can’t walk or talk very well, and while we are excited about the progress, the lack of mobility and communication difficulties are quite challenging. We just really want to see this stage of life over soon.

Then another woman came by…her name was Doris and she had been previously identified as the leader of the healing team. She sat down and after I explained what was going on, she lit up. I could see in her eyes that she 100% believed me when I said that Misty is getting better. She excitedly agreed that Misty is being healed and started to pray for her. Afterwards, she pointed out to me that 4 people she knows of have been healed from stage IV brain cancer recently (It’s always nice to hear those stories). Anyway, her faith was genuine and obvious. That continued the process of encouraging us. Then, the speaker for the evening (Jeff Beacham) came over and starting talking with me. By this time there was a fairly substantial crowd around Misty. He looked at me for just a split second and just handed me the mic. I was able to share with the few hundred people the story that we are witnessing. I got right to the point:

Just over two weeks ago, Misty was hospitalized for seizures. Her MRI showed the chemo wasn’t working and the doctor sent Misty home to die, suggesting she’d only be around for a week or two. Since that day…everyday has shown some improvement. We have faith and are believing we are seeing a miracle.

He spoke into the mic a prayer for Misty’s healing. Voices around the large sanctuary joined in repeating his words. After his prayer for Misty, he continued to pray for me as well as Misty’s parents and Olivia. It was uncanny, in a nice way. We felt loved in a place that wasn’t familiar (we often feel that in our usual church homes, but rarely in new places) and that’s a great testimony to them.

And for those of you who don’t care about the prayer and God aspect of this story, I have a beautiful anecdote: We were about 30 minutes into the service and miss Olivia begins to be a little noisy. I pack her on my shoulder and quickstep to the back of the room. Standing there, hoping she would stay quiet, I was slightly mortified when she loudly exclaimed a choice selection of the English language: “Poopy”. I immediately slipped out the door hoping to have kept the disturbance to a minimum and held her outside for a while. Five minutes rolls by and I begin to realize why she said that…I begin to feel wetness on my shirt. Yes, it’s as bad as you are thinking right now. She peed so much that it leaked out of her diaper and created a large circular wet spot dead center on my freshly pressed black polo. So yes, I went up front for the time of prayer with a large pee stain on my shirt. Oh Olivia.

And before I go, one more story. Today, we actually made it to church in the morning as well (this is pretty  great in and of itself).  During the music part of the service (often referred to as a “worship service”, by we christian folk) I saw Misty moving around out of the corner of my eye. It grabbed my attention, so I turned to find her swaying back and forth with the music. Then I heard something that continued to replay in my head for hours: her voice. She was singing. Now, she is still quite impaired in this area, but she was in fact singing. My eyes welled up as she mouthed along with the songs making sounds for many of the words. And my heart leaped and I almost chuckled out loud at the multiple times that she went for a word and actually nailed it. This is definite progress.

Today was a fabulous day indeed.

PS…Welcome to any of our new friends from Grace and Peace. Leave us a comment if you stop by.

I’m pretty good at public apologies. Well, at least I have a significant amount of experience with it. I always find myself in the unique position of agitating large groups of people somewhere (it’s a gift…haha). I’m never bothered by it though. I always felt that if I were being influencial, I’d probably tick someone off somewhere.  Well, today I have to apoligze for yesterday’s post. I got a bunch of emails on this. Many were nice and encouraging, but others were a bit unsure that it was appropriate that I named the verse “Psalm 151″. I did not intend to imply that my writing should be a psalm in the book of Psalms, so I probably shouldn’t have named it Psalm 151 (the book of the Bible stops at 150, but many might not know that). Also, the little text “A psalm of Misty” could have been easily missed – so I’m gonna change that post a little to make it more clear. So, I’m sorry for offending anyone. No heresy here…just a little verse I wrote to explain how I was feeling yesterday.

Today was very nice. No seizures for the second day in a row and overall she’s feeling very well. Everything is status quo or getting better. Today she said “forget it” and “who cares” in the same conversation. Communication is still very tough and those lines came out when she was getting frustrated with my lack of understanding…but it was encouraging that she is speaking a few more intelligible words. The progress is slow, but fairly consistently in the right direction.  Misty is anxious but not complaining.

I had a bunch of emotions tonight that I wanted to express, so I wrote a psalm. It’s in the style of a psalm of David, specifically like the New American Standard translation. The psalmist often repeats lines in different psalms, so I used verbage from other psalms in a couple lines here as well.

Psalm 151
For the Director of Music. A psalm of Misty.

O God, how great you are. Your grace is like a river that floods the barren wasteland, breathing life to the lifeless and giving hope to the hopeless.

I cried to you from the pit of darkness and you inclined your ear to me. The cords of death encompassed me but you heard my prayer and took action. You plucked me out of the grave and put my feet on solid ground.

O God, do not let me be ashamed for putting my faith in you; bring deliverance quickly. Do not tary, but bring to completion the work that you have begun.

I will turn my heart toward you for all my days, for you have rescued my face from sorrow and my life from destruction. I will praise you forever.

Right now, we are doing pretty good. It wasn’t always that way though. In recent months, Misty and I have seen some dark times. Sometimes where there was little hope. I often confessed with my mouth that I had hope in God…but it was shallow. But somehow, today we are very different. We now have a full expectancy that something crazy (good) is happening in Misty…that she is going to get completely better. And this confidence actually started  well before we started to see an improvement in her body. So what was the change? Well, I think there are many factors. The largest of which was probably prayer and reading the bible (we listen to the bible on cd a lot…even as we fall asleep). This focus has greatly impacted us. There are a variety of small pieces that all fit together as well to tell the story of how we went from hopelessness to hope. I’ll pen that story someday, but for today, I’m going to share one of the small pieces with you: music.

We have been listening to encouraging, God-centered music. I’m including the song that has connected with me most over the last couple of months. I have been brought to tears listening to it on multiple occasions.   The song is called “You are still holy” written by Rita Springer and performed by Klaus Kuehn with Kari Jobe. Click on the little triangle play button below to listen to the song.

This whole CD is quite good, but that song is the highlight for me. You can get it on itunes. The album is called healing waters.

PS…today was a nice day. Misty enjoyed herself. Olivia is getting some molars so her nose was running all day. But on the bright side, she is enjoying getting to drink children’s Tylenol religiously every 4 hours.

Today was good.  Misty has been wanting cotton candy for a couple days so we made the trip down to the Point Pleasant boardwalk (about 45min…the closest place we could get it). It’s about 11pm and I’m exhausted…so, for the first time in months, I’m going to get to sleep before midnight.

Thanks though to everyone who fasted today with me. (it’s Wednesday…the pray for misty day).

By the way, thanks for the comments on guitars. FYI: I have always been a fan of Carvin guitars (I own 2 of their electrics and have purchased 3 of their acoustics for other people over the years) but I’m really wanting a guitar with saddle transducer and electret microphone hybrid pickup system. They don’t have one in their line up so I’m looking for one of the Mahogany body models from some other guys. Seagull and Larrivee are top of the list (thanks to some emails I got from everyone), followed by Martin  but there are others on the table as well. 

Here is a parting thought:

Psalm 121

 1 I lift up my eyes to the hills—
       where does my help come from?

 2 My help comes from the LORD,
       the Maker of heaven and earth.

 3 He will not let your foot slip—
       he who watches over you will not slumber;

 4 indeed, he who watches over Israel
       will neither slumber nor sleep.

 5 The LORD watches over you—
       the LORD is your shade at your right hand;

 6 the sun will not harm you by day,
       nor the moon by night.

 7 The LORD will keep you from all harm—
       he will watch over your life;

 8 the LORD will watch over your coming and going
       both now and forevermore.

It’s that time…

That wonderful time in life when you become consumed with trying to convine your toddler to do in a toilet what she is perfectly content doing in her diaper all by herself.  Today was the first crack at it. No luck. She loves the first part – losing the diaper and hopping up on her potty – but the second part is where we have trouble. She usually runs away naked after about 30 seconds. If she doesn’t run away, she sits there contently saying “poopy” – as if the goal is to talk about it as much as possible.

We really should have tried this a while ago. She has been telling us about it for like 6 months now. Oh well, we have had other things on our minds :)

Speaking of other things, today was great.

• No seizures
• Misty felt pretty good all day and ate well
• She got out a few more words (she said “I love you”)

Then after dinner we went outside and made a fire (fires are not as commonplace in NJ as they are many other places – thank God for the cheap little fire pit thingys you can pick up at target). We sat on the bench swing together with arms linked…just talking. It was nice. You know, sometimes I get so wrapped up in meeting Misty’s physical and emotional needs that I forget about her intrinsic social needs as well. I’m so focused, I forget to be affectionate.  Well, tonight was nice. Just sitting and holding her on the swing in front of the fire. And as a cherry, she communicated to me that she felt she heard from God about this whole ordeal. She knows she will get better…so she’s not worried.

PS. I need to pick up an acoustic guitar, the one I’ve been using to have worship times here at home was a loaner and had to go back to church (since I’m not there using it). Normally I obsess about big purchases for weeks reading a minimum of like 3000 reviews and forum comments (slight exaggeration, but not much). No time for that. If anyone has researched professional acoustics in the last couple years, drop me an email. I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Today would have been perfect if we went to sleep for the evening at dinner time. But unfortunately, we didn’t.

Let’s start with the good…

We went to Smithville today. Misty, Olivia and I went with Claudia and Arielle (misty’s mom and sister). For those of you local folks, Smithville is a quaint little town off Exit 48 on the Parkway. It has lots of little shops and a few places to eat. The idea is, you are supposed to feel like you are in a small town from years ago. I guess it does that pretty well, but even if it doesn’t, they have sabrett push-cart-style hot dogs and plenty of fudge – that makes it worth the trip. Anyway, Misty got out and about in the wheel chair and ate a slice of pizza for lunch. She read the menu and pointed to cheese pizza, so I asked her to make sure she wanted pizza…and yes, we got it right (this reading thing is still cool to me). You can see the photo gallery of the day HERE. It was lovely.

Then as we were finishing a late dinner Olivia came into the kitchen and said, “Mommy’s sleeping”. I started to correct her: “no, mommy’s eating ” – then I realized what was going on. I ran into the living room and sure enough, Misty’s eyes were closed and she had started to have a seizure. Every seizure since we have been home from the hospital has been a small focal seizure (nothing to worry about – just facial movements) until tonight. I immediately started praying for her. Unfortunately, soon her body started to jerk and shake and go into the whole deal. I stuck olivia in her high chair, pushed her into the kitchen (out of view) and gave her some slices of a pear. Those only lasted about 30 seconds…then she was quite unhappy for the next 15 minutes until my mom showed up to console her and give her a bath to distract her.

I laid Misty on the floor and gave her a shot of diazepam as I continued to pray. I was a bit  upset because it was starting to look like we were in for another incurable seizure (the last one took 5 hrs to stop and a close to lethal dose of drugs – she had to be watched for a day to make she she didn’t stop breathing or anything). I decided to call the doctor. Ring….ring….his service didn’t pick up. Tried again. no luck. I tried the visiting nurse – no answer. Doctor again – nope (this is very unusual…he is always accessible). I wasnt’ having any luck. A while later, without the doctors blessing I was looking for, I gave her another shot. I had checked dosage info quickly online to make sure it was ok, but still wanted to check with the doctor. 

Anyway, it stopped. About 40 minutes altogether. I guess the bright side is that it was much better than the last big seizure. The downside of course is that this happened yet again. I’m not really happy about this. And I hate that Olivia has to be exposed to this. At least she is learning how to pray…whenever we pray, she always jumps in at the very end and finishes with an emphatic “A-men”.

I wear my heart on my sleeve. If you know me for 5 minutes you can tell that. I’m the kind of person who basically never considers a questions “too personal” and will pretty much discuss anything with you. I don’t hide or put up fronts; what you see is what you get. I also don’t make stuff up for attention. If I say I’m having a bad day, it’s not to get pity…it’s just to be honest (I try to be real…almost to a fault). And everyday that I say it is a good day…again, I don’t make stuff up. Most days lately have been great, both physically and emotionally; for Misty as well as for me and Olivia.

Having said that, I’m going to let you into my mind for a few moments. So, the doctors have given Misty 2 weeks to live and yet 11 days later, she is still getting better. Even today, she woke up early and wanted to go to church (this is new). You would expect this progress to put a smile on my face…a smile that covers my face from ear to ear and doesn’t go away. I should be so excited for the small steps in the right direction. But instead, I’m anxious and tired…I’m just ready for it to be over and for her to be back to full health. It’s like I’m taking for granted that God is doing an amazing miracle before my eyes. I’m such an Israelite**. Maybe I just need to shut up and go to bed. Tomorrow will inevitably be better. That’s the trend lately (I really do thank God for that).

** (This is a reference to the Israelites in the Old Testament of the Bible – who while being fed bread from the sky each morning, complained that God’s provision of food wasn’t enough. They wanted steak. Losers. Read the story HERE)